Tales from the Grocery Store...

There are few things that irritate me like grocery shopping irritates me. Maybe it’s the fact that I usually do it on my own, or the fact that it never fails: there’s someone with a cart that can’t figure out to stay toward the side of the aisle (“MOOOVE”—Ludicrous). Grocery trips with my mom were always an epic adventure of carefully-crafted chaos. One child would take a group of coupons to one part of the store; the other child would take another group. Dad would wreak havoc by throwing things whenever possible; Mom would go into full-military-assault mode, and we would, in short, take over the entire store.

I’m not kidding—you could hear us from one end of Schnucks to the other.  I’m really, REALLY good at “Mom?  Mom???? MOOOOOOOMMMMM?!?!?!” I think that's probably how I developed excellent vocal projection...I guess I should send Schnucks a letter of thanks...

Mom is EXCELLENT at “WHAAAAT?!?!?  I SWEAR, I CAN’T TAKE YOU KIDS ANYWHERE-WAIT! WHERE IS YOUR FATHER?!?!?!  JEFFREYJEFFREYJEFFREY!!!!  $%*($%*(*! 

If reality shows would have been a thing during my childhood, we would have made a fantastic one. It would be some caustic combination of Real World/HoneyBooBoo/Bridezilla+Momzilla/ThriftShopDivas/Italian-By-Proxy/BradyBunch AWESOMENESS. We would have rocked your airwaves. Grocery shopping, school programs, after-church dinners—My family is an entertaining bunch, to say the least. But, back on topic: The Grocery Store.

Rarely do I venture to the grocery store during the week. My workdays are long enough that by the time I’ve picked JD up from the sitters, I’m finished. But, last night, we were out of almond milk…and Lord help you if that poor baby doesn’t get his warm almond milk at bedtime (Yuppie baby!)! And, we were out of fruit, vegetables, etc., so off to Shop-And-Save I went.  It’s a necessary evil; I didn’t even go into it with a bad attitude. It was the usual, “Let’s DO this,” and get the heck home as quickly as possible. I grabbed JD, loaded everything into the cart—oh, wait, the cart safety straps are broken!—transitioned to a new cart—and off we went.

Some parents don’t like to run errands with their little ones. I understand, but that’s not how I roll. JD is my little shopping buddy. He likes to stroll through the mall (it’s air-conditioned, so we go there a lot to play). He loves all of the bright colors in the stores, and as he’s gotten older, he’s recognizing things. He’s just now starting to try to touch things, and I’m learning that I have to say “no” to certain things. I’m avoiding toy aisles…not for HIM, but for ME, because I am a SUCKER for buying toys.

Yesterday, I was SO tired…but we had to go to the grocery store, and honestly, I’m glad we did. He’s just so cute, and so funny; he eyeballs people, and he waves. So far, no one can resist saying “Hi” back to him (which is good for them). We went through the produce section, and he got really excited when I showed him the bananas. “NA-na!  NA-na!” was yelled as we went through several different aisles, regardless of what he was looking at (he started it back up again as we were checking out). We practiced our words (PoTAto!  Rnge!—that’s “orange” to you), and he waved like he was the Grand Marshall.

Periodically, I would lean in and kiss his head (it’s hard to resist that giant melon); he started reaching up and “honk”ing my nose. He’s learned his parts of the face, and since I have a prominent proboscis, it’s pretty easy for him to grab. I’d “honk” his wee nose in return, and his giggle would ring through the store.

I’m not afraid to look like an idiot for my son. We’d sing back and forth; there was some jumping on the cart, and general bee-bopping around. We made it fun, and I caught a few people laughing as we walked by.

I wasn’t feeling particularly well yesterday; I’m still not. But as I went to bed last night, I thought about our little trip to the grocery store, and about how much fun it was. Sure, having a toddler with you can make life more complicated.

It definitely makes it more memorable.

The Timehop app on my tablet reminds me every day of what I was doing 1, 2, 3, 4 years ago; those memories from 3-4 years ago are precious, but they’re nothing like the memories our family has created since JD came into the picture. It’s not been an easy road, but it’s been the best road we’ve ever traveled.

Life with our little guy is the most amazing of adventures…even the mundane has become magnificent. Every day is a photo op that’s burned onto my brain. The things we do in the evening become memories that sustain me through my day; every work day is spent waiting anxiously to get home to cuddle that baby, to pinch his cheeks, and to smell that sweet, messy toddler hair. He’s dramatic, hilarious, curious, excited…Every day with him is so new, and so much fun. I see so much of myself, and so much of David; it’s such a crazy ride!

This blog isn’t particularly insightful…it’s just my amazement in how things have changed. Parenthood makes life…Well, I guess it just Makes Life.

And that’s all I have to say about that.