Something to Think About

I didn't write this...it was sent to me by one of the matriarchs of our church...and I found it particularly poignant, especially with the way this week has gone for me...I hope this blesses you this week of Thanksgiving...

What Do You Need to Remember?

November 09
by John Paul Jackson

“Remember these, O Jacob,
And Israel , for you are My servant;
I have formed you, you are My servant;
O Israel , you will not be forgotten by Me!”
— Isaiah 44:21

November is the month in which many Americans make a point to remember. On Veterans Day, we honor the brave men and women who have fought for our freedom; we remember those who actively make sacrifices on our behalf. On Thanksgiving Day, we surround ourselves with family and friends and call to mind the things that are important to us, what we are grateful for: God, loved ones, our children, our houses, our jobs, maybe the realization of our dreams.

Remembering is one of the most important things we can do as children of God. David wrote in Psalm 42 that he would remember God. Therefore I will remember You. Why is this important? Because we tend to forget Him the moment something else grabs our attention.

We get caught up in the day-to-day issues of our lives, and the promises God made to us, in the quiet and secret place where only we could hear, slide right out of our minds. Obviously, what He said still exists — it has not been forgotten in Heaven. But His words can be very, very hard for us to hold onto, even if we have them written down. It can be difficult for us to remember who God is, who He has shown Himself to be in our lives, what He has told us and the hope we felt when He said it.

During this season, what do you need to remember? Do you need to remember just to relax? Do you need to remember not to worry? Maybe there’s a certain Scripture or promise that God wants you, and you specifically, to consider and hold onto this month. Perhaps it is something you have dismissed because of its apparent simplicity, such as Jesus loves me. He truly does. Though this truth seems like it would be easy to remember, many of us forget it all the time.

This very day, take a moment and ask God what He wants you to remember. What is it that He wants you to understand at a deeper level? The list below may be a good place to start:
I will not forget You, God. I will remember what You have done for me.
I will remember all the times You spoke to me when I was at the end of my rope.
I will remember all the times You have come through for me before.
I will remember all the times I was afraid and shouldn’t have been, because You worked it out.
I will remember that You are good.
I will remember what You have promised.
I will remember how You love me.

An Open Letter to Adam Lambert...

Dear Adam,
I don't think you'll ever see this, and I'm okay with that. I just felt the need to say a few things to you, and to Hollywood in general. Sorry for making you the face of celebrity today, but I believe your performance at the American Music Awards is officially the straw that has broken the camel's back for me in many ways.
I loved you on American Idol, I truly did. Based on talent alone, you were the most gifted performer that stage has seen in history, and I voted for you more times that I've ever voted for anyone before--and this is coming from a thirty-two year-old! I'm a fan of talent over anything, and in your own words, yes, you can "sing your face off." I've never seen anyone sing like you...you're magnetic. I could tell you were hiding behind the American Idol machine, but I didn't think it mattered much...
Something happened.
Of course you're gay, I mean, who couldn't figure that one out? I knew it from the first time you were on the stage, and sexuality is part of how you sold yourself on AI. It's part of the music industry, and I guess we're all dulled to it by now. I had higher hopes for you, though...I didn't care about your sexuality. That's supposed to be between you and God. American Idol is, after all, a talent show, and though previous winners have been "sexy," so to speak, it never influenced my vote. Gay, straight, whatever--can you sing? And man, can you! So you had my vote.
I wasn't expecting you to be Carrie Underwood-clean.
I wasn't thinking you'd be Clay Aiken (thank God).
I was hoping you'd be Adam Lambert: Brilliant. Rock. Icon.
Instead, after watching tonight's performance, I got Adam Lambert: Crotch Monkey.
That performance wasn't just shocking--Madonna rolling on the floor at the VMA's singing "Like a Virgin" was shocking--it was filthy.
Not kinda dirty fun...Filthy.
Like, the camera had to pan to the audience and off the stage filthy.
It was desperate.
You're better than that...at least, I'd hoped you would be.
I'm disappointed, and I know I'm not the only one...
Things don't have to be that kind of sexy if you're truly talented, Adam, and you are, so why did you have to take it that far? You're better than that, and honestly, I think you should take some time and reflect on why you're in the music industry in the first place, and who you're surrounding yourself with.
Music should bring people together, to have fun and celebrate, and that performance, made me feel like I needed a shower.
I posted on Facebook that I wish I would have turned it off, but I was hoping it would get better. I was hoping for campy fun...that was NOT it.
If our country can sit and watch a performance like that, and not feel outraged at the direction the moral compass has taken in America, we're in BIG trouble. I'm not trying to be judgmental...but that "performance" was so graphic, so over-sexualized, and so in-your-face...it made me sad that the show is called the "American" Music Awards...
I know I'm taking it out on you, Adam...after all, you're hardly the first to come out on national television and scar our retinas with literal junk...but really, it's the disappointment speaking. I had higher hopes for you, especially since my votes are part of how you got in your position.
Now I feel terribly, terribly guilty...and sad, that like so many, I was fooled into believing that talent might be the thing we were voting for....
Too many truly talented people get on this Hollywood machine and become a trainwreck of flash and flesh, lose who they were to begin with, and burn out far too soon...Hollywood may have just found it's new poster-child....

Quiet on the home front...

I realize that I've been kinda quiet lately. Sometimes, the thoughts and feelings come so quickly that I can't even sort them out enough to begin to write them down...so I don't. Then the issue is that I internalize what's really going on, but lash out at people with little surface annoyances. Translation: I will yell at David over a pair of missing socks, but what I really mean, is that I'm about to cry any second now, and I don't want to, so I'll release the pressure another way. Sounds crazy, right? Yeah, I know.
David and I have been busy...I'm trying to break out of my hermit-ness, and am getting a social life, so we've been going out and spending time with people. I spoke on behalf of the American Heart Association, to the employees at the West County Macy's, yesterday. I literally condensed my "story" with AHA heart disease facts, into a 7 minute speech. 7 minutes!!!! It took me 45 minutes to make it through it, the first time! I knew I only had a few minutes with these guys, but even I felt like, "whoa." Seven minutes? That actually kind of hurts. I know that it goes with the territory--when you're raising awareness, you speak in whatever time slot you have. That's just the first time I've had that kind of time frame. I'll get used to it--but it kind of felt like an out-of-body thing, where I'm like, "where did I get the strength to tell this story in 7 minutes?" God gives us the coolest grace!!!

So, we made it through the biggest milestone: Hannah would have turned 3 on October 30th. (And I swear to you, if one more religious person sits there and tells me, "Oh, she doesn't have any more birthdays; she's with Jesus now so she's eternal!" I am going to throw something. Yes, people, I get it, I swear I do. Hannah's in Heaven, no aging, yadayadayada. But that's my baby, I'm her momma, and I'm still thinking in birthdays. If that makes me un-Godly, well, I don't think we serve the same God. 'Cause He likes birthdays, too. And He gets me.) We went to her place (I call Hannah's grave her "spot." I don't like the word "grave," It's creepy), put out her new "flowers," and hung out at Chesterfield Mall, because I hadn't been there in 2 years.
I really like making Hannah's little pieces. It's a creative outlet, and I don't know that anyone would get it, that hadn't lost someone they loved. It's something I can do that's unique to Hannah's spot, and I put a lot of time into these things. In a way, it kind of feels like playing "dress-up." I can understand why that would creep someone out, but please understand, it's all I've got.
So, we went out there, to the mall, and then to my brother-in-law, Eugene's, for a hayride. And of course, as with all Cooley adventures, someone got hurt and had to go to Urgent Care--oh, wait, that's me! David went to shift his position on a hayride, and didn't realize that when he put his weight on his elbow, that MY HAND WAS UNDER HIS ELBOW!!! It immediately swelled up; the bruising is going down, and it's not broken, but it's still extremely sore, and I've no patience for the healing process, so I've been kind of a baby this week. Thankfully, my boss knows her stuff, and she's done a lot of great things to help it out!!! And, that's another reason why I haven't been blogging over the past week. It hurts to type!!!!!

Halloween was spent at our awesome church, Southgate. We helped out with the Full-Size Candy Bar Extravaganza, and gave candy to the kids in the huge neighborhood around our church. We have some great people at Southgate, and I'm glad it's finally starting to feel more like home again. It took a few months, and an attitude change on my part, but David and I are coming around. Good people!

I've worked a lot since my last post, but that's nothing new. I'm so blessed, in that I truly do love my job. Even on the days when it's stressing me out, not a day goes by that I don't thank God for my job, my boss, and my patients. I get to meet a lot of really cool people, with some very different mindsets. Sometimes it takes me a bit to get past some of the more avant-garde mindsets--but everyone I see in that office has a good heart, and that's a tremendous blessing in the medical field! I have such an interesting job--I'll have to tell you more about it, in another post. I'm an office manager for a chiropractic/alternative healing office, and we do things there that no one else in St. Louis can do. It's a crazy, ridiculous, fascinating place to be, and I love it.

Even though it's been just over a week since my last post, I feel like it's been a month!!!! Between being busy at work, and the hecticness of this weekend, it's a whirlwind! Yesterday, not only did I speak at Macy's; David and I had pictures taken at JC Penney's! We hadn't had studio pictures taken since we got engaged, like, 6 years ago. Let's face it; we look a little different now! My weight is actually a little lighter than when we got engaged....but I have new fine lines that I never saw coming! It's weird--I look like such a kid in my engagement picture, even though I was 26. Here I am, at 32, and I look at these pictures, and OMG, I think I just might be a grown-up...shudder... We also went to a dinner at my friend Deb's house, where God just totally blessed us with a perfect meeting of the perfect people at the perfect time...more on that, later...

Meanwhile...

Please pray for us. There's something percolating in our family that will affect David and I directly; I'm not going into details, because it's too soon (no, I'm not pregnant), and we need more information. It's potential...We need direction, we need understanding; we need to take things day-to-day, and I need to guard my heart (literally). Please pray for us, that God will take our hands and show us what to do, and how to do it; that He will prepare all hearts to be involved, and that no hearts will be broken as we walk this path....

So, on that note...Here are a few pics of me and my hubby. Yesterday, I introduced him at Macy's as my best friend and teammate. I think that's the very least I could say about this man. There simply is no one like David Cooley, and through Hell or high water, I am blessed to be married to him. And darn it, we look cute together, LOL!